Lately

I have been so distracted and have been feeling very dis-connected, lately.
It's not because God is distant or isn't there...of course He is there. He's reaching out for my hand...
It's me that is the problem. I always try to do things on my own and then when everything falls apart, I become angry at God, building this wall around my heart.

I have the hardest time with surrender. I don't know if it's because I'm afraid, or if I don't understand it... or if I'm just more content and satisfied in holding onto everything. Like, I don't trust that God will help me or take on my burdens, even though He said He would. I'm not sure why I have a hard time with surrender, but I know that that is the only way things will begin to make sense again.

I'm not waiting on the Lord...I am HOPING in Him.
He knows what He is doing. He knows exactly how I feel. He cares...I/We need to trust completely in that.

Peace
Liz